Thursday, November 03, 2011

Last Chance

My English Exam's Essay -- Not based on a true story.


     My father is my inspiration. He runs our family so good that all of his children grown up really well. My sisters and my brothers have shown their incredible academics to him. They became his pride. However, I did not.

     "How come you failed in your exam? You are such a disappointment!" said my father while throwinh my report card to me. My mother beside me was trying to console me and to keep me from crying. It was hard for me to hold back my tears. i really wanted to impress him like all my siblings did.

     I was in form 5 so it was my SPM year. My biggest exam in my life. My biggest fear. So, I took the initiative to keep learning until I get to achieve my goal, or to be exact, my father's goal. I stayed in school after my classes ended just to spend time to study and asked my teachers around the school whenever I do not understand something.

     It was the day of my SPM. I remember that I would pray before answering each paper. I prayed that God would help me and make my father proud. I longed to impress my father. "This is my last chance to show him what I can do. My very last chance," I thought. So I answered my papers fervently.

     SPM had passed over a month and the results were finally out. My parents followed me to get my results. After a while, I took my results and nervously looked at it. My father was standing there waiting for me to tell him. My mother grabbed my other arm. "I get all As except for one. I get C for my Math," I said holding back my tears. Then, for some reasons which I did not know, I hugged my father saying, "Father, forgive me. I blew out my last chance to impress you. If only I get straight As... I really blew it, father. I'm really sorry." Suddenly I felt him stroked my hair while I was still sobbing. "You do impress me, silly. Academics don't mean anything when the person is really beautiful, inside out like you. I was impressed with you today but were always my pride because of who you are. I was only hard on you because I love you," he said.

I got 43 for this essay. I don't know the full marks for this section.
So, below are my teacher's comments.

-Accurate language
-Well planned, have unity and linked


 

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