Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Today Is My Birthday !

Well, I'm officially seventeen today. Am I excited? Hmm, not really. When I was a kid, I used to be excited when my birthday was coming. I even counted the days when it was still like three months away and when it was only a day away, I would be like, "Yipee! One more day, then it will be my birthday!" But now, it's like, "Oh no.. One more day and I'm gonna be old."
I know why I fear of getting old. Because I'm the baby in the family for all these while, I'm afraid to carry out any responsibilities and taking good care of myself now-on my own. I know I'm gonna have to leave this house sooner or later. Honestly, I'm not ready to grow up. I'm not ready to face the world on my own. I still need my parents. I still want to be a student for a long time. I don't want it to end this year! My seventeenth birthday reminds me all the time about my final year in school. There, I said it. Again. FINAL YEAR.
Anyway, nothing special today. I honestly woke up this morning feeling like it's just one of those normal days. I'm serious! Nothing special at all.
I don't even feel well today. Kept having nausea and stomach ache. But I felt better now.
Everyone kept saying, "Kenapa birthday girl muka begini ni?" - (Why is a birthday girl makes that face?)

Is it normal to have this feeling? Is it normal to feel sad when you know you're old?
Of course I feel grateful to God that I'm still alive today. It's just that ... time flies really fast. Sigh.

Anyway, I registered on a local tuition centre just now. I'm taking Maths and Science. I'm quite slow in these two subjects. Hmm..

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