Friday, October 28, 2016

Life Updates


I'm trying so hard to keep up with my writing here but seems like life is taking over me. Not complaining though. I don't have anything extravagant to write about for now but I would like to just post up some updates with my life. I want to use my blog as a way to connect myself with people. I want to be personal because it seems like people can't really know me just by my tweets or other social media posts. I mean, I barely even go to my Facebook anymore.

1. Physical
On my previous post, I was talking about my addiction with caffeine. Well, sorry to disappoint but I caved in on the 6th day. I was having withdrawals symptoms because I've been relying to coffee for the longest time. I'm sorry but for now I'm trying to take it on moderation, which seems to work pretty well with my health. I get energized, tired and getting my rest with just the right amount. So, it's all good. My body still jerks sometimes when I sleep though I don't know why.
Aside from that, I've been sick a few times and Meniere's disease(I'll talk about this on another post) was acting up from time to time which was not helping with my days' productivity.

2. Emotional
I've never openly talked about this but I have been struggling with depression for so long. I mean, it's not really all the time though but there comes a time I feel so rejected and worthless and feeling like my world is collapsing while being wide awake at 3 a.m. I've never really checked if it's a clinical depression or not so I don't really know why I'm like this but I know part of this is because of the devil's lies to me. However, for now I'm really really happy. I haven't felt this happy for such a long time. I know some of my close friends are praying for me and I know it's because God is working through my cries to Him. This is such a beautiful time with my heart being so content right now. There were some ups and downs these past few days but with all of my struggles, I tried working it out and stop believing to the devil's lies, even if it was so easy to fall again. I know I screwed up a lot of times but the fact that the Almighty God still trying to help me up, I just... I can't even put it into words.

3. Productivity
Oh my gosh these past couple of months were such a creative time for me I've been creating a lot of art, getting portrait orders, developing my ukulele skills, writing, singing... I love it! Although, all of the work needed to get done in one go, I managed to pull through the stress and challenges. One customer wanted me to start over the drawing I did where I put all of my effort in two days because it wasn't good enough. I mean, yeah I was down and I cried on my bed for like 30 minutes but I shrugged it off and started it again because crying won't solve anything. It was a proud moment for me. Oh! I also got my first portrait order from USA. It was from Sarah Tuttle, my friend I knew from Twitter. That was the first time I got an order from outside the country and I'm so happy my talent is appreciated from people so far away! 
Still, I wish I kinda get to do more creative things for the past couple of months though. I didn't even complete the 31 days of #inktober. I have to challenge myself more for the next few months.

Sarah's lil bro, Thad
Sarah and Thad
Inktober from day 13
4. Social
Well, since being at home most of the time I don't meet a lot of people but I'm kinda okay with it, I guess? Most probably because I'm an introvert. I mostly talk to my friends I know through Chris Howard (Pun Diddley on Youtube) and Blimey Cow(also a Youtube channel) on Twitter. I know some of you may be skeptic towards internet friendsips. I used to too but I'm legitimately telling you that I have never met people so far away that could be so close to my heart. So, yeah I'm socializing through Twitter and sometimes on Snapchat too. I don't get to talk to them much nowadays though because I have so much things to do. I miss spending hours with my internet best friend, Mel, just messaging each other. But we made a pact to start being serious about our lives now. 

Those are pretty much all of the things happening with me now. I hope from these updates, you get to follow me more on my life. Congratulations for reading 'till this part. I don't know if you like reading but I know it's a long post. Some may prefer watching youtube videos but I'm more comfortable on expressing my thoughts through writing. Although, I'm kinda interested on starting a youtube channel but probably not anytime soon. I need to work more on my confidence and charisma.

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